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Forum Moderators: lawman
I've decided to try something new. Yes, I am going to make money now just for myself and not for others. Interesting concept. I will probably be lurking in new forums and trying to learn new skills.
Good wishes and good luck to my friends.
I am so thankful for all the kind wishes, wonderful stickies, emails and one very special call from a friend, well Iím sure he knows. I hope you all know how sincere I am with my regards.
Last Friday I thought I had reached this apex. I could only see wonderful things ahead professionally, a reward for an enormous amount of hard work, sacrifice and service. That really is who I am in my core - hard work, sacrifice and service. On Monday everything I had seen as right professionally was wrong and everything I saw as good professionally was bad. To my core of my being I felt betrayed. Now, I donít like to but I do own my stuff. I stick to things until they resolve, I am obnoxious about that as those who know me can tell. I will persist like a cancer; itís awful Iím sure. My kids will tell you I am the queen of the lecture. I guess through the trial of my life red is now red and white is now white and I see no pink. I may be in red and see I should be in white so I analyze my way through to the white in the end, one way or another. I admit I can be mentally challenging. It may surprise some of you but I am very much a women and can be quite emotional when pressed to it.
Now stay with me, I promise to get to a good point or at least give you a moment of pause. Either way I hope after all the posts Iíve made these past few years youíll give me this and stick with me a moment. I also hope this will help those other of you in business from a slightly different perspective. That shouldnít surprise anyone that I might want to offer a slightly different vision.
With every eruption comes chaos, I think we can agree to that. I heard a wise man once speak about a volcanic eruption and the land covered with ash, destruction and loss everywhere. Everyone is shocked and trying to hold up the pieces. From that comes new life, very different. Well, for me the spark of life came quickly in a call from a person I know in cyber space and not really that well except to say that he has always responded honorably and quite with peace. He reminded me to go back to the core. I donít know really if thatís the message he intended but itís what I got. Also a lot of really good talk about cookies ;)
I actually found peace again. I have to say without breaking confidence that this person is a very cool member of this board and strengthens my already loyal and faithful belief in this community. Now, it may not seem like long enough or that I didnít think about it enough when I made this decision to resign as a mod, after all how can one eruption have anything to do with the other? I have been through too many battles over the last few years to fight another one. Iím not beat down but Iíve learned the hard way to pick my battles, conserve my strength.
I really love Webmasterworld. That might sound silly to some and Iím trying to get my blog going again so I talk more about the experience. Itís really been great for me and I donít mind sharing that. I love to learn. I love to research, gather statistics, talk theory and grow. Itís dull I know but it turns me on so be it. Well Joseph Campbell once said, ďfollow your bliss.Ē I like that. Unfortunately my bliss is learning and that is not always an easy path.
Ready for the confession? I have been living in complacency. While I thought my professional life was progressing, and in all reality it was, my mental life was stagnant. I havenít been learning because I have been so busy trying to say the same thing over the last six months that needed to be said, trying to make it interesting but well you know. Secondly my ego is stuck on a superficial level. I was trying to tell myself these last six months that this was good enough. Itís not! Thank the chaos because through this not only did I find myself again, abet a bit battered and bruised I have exciting new options.
My friend first suggestion once I spilled the whole awful mess in his ear and he reminded me I had a core and a cookie ;) (sweet) and after I had made my decisions his first directions was to go learn. Wow! How cool is that and how perfect? So, what is my message? I donít have one this time except to myself. I do want to thank you all for the last few years and then I have a favor. I want to start learning some new things, hanging out in different forums then the ones I have. I donít want to give I want to ask. Iíll probably start with my blog, css, some cgi (oh I hate that one but I need help with programming.) Who knows what else but Iíll be lurking about. You can always sticky me if you want me to check out an interesting linking question, I may have an opinion but maybe not. Let the young take over. I hope that doesnít seem so strange to you all. It can be a tough transition from this pseudo teacher roll Iíve acquired back to that of a student, especially in the same school so to speak.
I hope I didnít step on any toes. Iím not playing games this is who I am. Thanks!
Peace from my heart, I mean that ~ Debra