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European Union to regulate search replies. (April Fools)

Release of white paper expected today.

         

rencke

7:18 am on Apr 1, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



European Union to regulate search replies.
Release of white paper expected today.

WebmasterWorld - Brussels, April 1, 2001

The European Commission [europa.eu.int] is now moving swiftly towards a binding directive, that will force search engines to rank official government sites above others for selected keywords. The directive will apply to all engines owned by companies registered in any of the 15 member states [europa.eu.int] and in addition to all engines operating under their national domains, irrespective of legal residence.

A committee under the Directorate General for the Information Society [europa.eu.int] is expected to release a first draft of a white paper later today. WebmasterWorld has been unable to reach Commissioner Erkki Liikanen [europa.eu.int], but sources within the commission indicate that the initiative comes from the Swedish Presidency [eu2001.org], which wants the matter resolved before handing the presidency over to Belgium on July 1st.

We are having a hard time getting any kind of ranking at all for our government sites, says a well placed source within Sweden's Department for Industry, Employment and Communication [naring.regeringen.se]. We simply cannot spend taxpayers' money on expensive search engine optimizers [webmasterworld.com]. All governments seem to have the same problem, so a binding EU directive is likely to gather unanimous support. It is the fastest and most cost effective way to attain high rankings.

But Brussels is less confident about a quick vote. The original idea was that official sites were to get top ranking only for the name of their country in the eleven official languages - e.g. Deutschland, Germany, Tyskland, Allemange etc. Several countries are however pushing for additional targeted keywords, as does the commission itself.

We are spending gigantic amounts on farm subsidies and it is only fair, that the homepage of the Directorate General for Agriculture [europa.eu.int] should have a top ranking for the phrase "farm subsidies", says Mr Saatana Ruotsalainen, spokesman for the directorate. As it is, we are not even in the top 50 for that phrase in Altavista [altavista.com].

The chairman of the Working Group for the Search Engine Rankings Directive - Mrs Efcharistopoli Krastafadopoglou - is concerned that things may get completely out of hand. She denies that Britain has asked for "Baby Leo", but refuses to comment on rumours that France wants to target "gloire" (glory) in all languages and does not want to confirm that Belgium seeks top ranking for "frites" (french fries).

If more than one country wants to target the same keyword, we could end up in endless negotiations, she says. The whole process could take a decade. She is also concerned that Google [google.com], a leading American search engine operating under a dot-com address, cannot be covered by the directive. The current EU chairman, Swedish Prime Minister Göran Persson [statsradsberedningen.regeringen.se], is expected to bring the matter up with President George W. Bush [whitehouse.gov] when he attends the European summit in Gothenburg [eu2001.org] June 15-16.

The US State Department [state.gov] is not impressed. We already have top rankings in Google [google.com]. If the Europeans want the same it is going to cost them, a senior official told WebmasterWorld. The United States [50states.com] has lots of beef and bananas that we want to sell on European markets. And that's just for starters. We're talking major concessions here, he concluded.

More [europa.eu.int]

heini

10:51 am on Apr 1, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



>that Belgium seeks top ranking for "frites" (french fries).<
Sorry, but that´s beyond me. Why should belgium government should want #1 position on frites? Does the government sell them?
If official sites hold #1 positions for their respective countries name: ok, why not. Doesn´t hurt anybody, does it?
Besides, if this becomes a general rule everybody will know this very soon and will simply not click #1....

heini

11:42 am on Apr 1, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



also beyond me is why people put so much effort in those da**** april jokes...
perhaps because people like me fall for it every single time... :)

rencke

12:00 pm on Apr 1, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Ätsch - 1. April :)

Very old tradition in your country by the looks of it:
[kirchenweb.at...]
What I found particularly interesting is that you found Belgium and 'frites' strange, but not France and 'glory'.

Btw: Congratulations. I see you just made it to preferred mamber. Hang on in there and you will soon be a senior and get a star on your shoulder.

heini

4:25 pm on Apr 1, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Thank you rencke, and what a great way to become a preferred member! :)
Of course I also clicked on that microsoft-has-just-bought-google thing. I mean, you´ll have to tell me about ufos and such before I get suspicous. I just tend to take people seriously....
Frites? I hate them! The rape of the potato!

rencke

4:55 pm on Apr 1, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



>I just tend to take people seriously....
According to Kirchenweb April fools day was invented in Germany in the 1530ies, so I figured all Germans had their guard up on April 1 and didn't expect to catch one. I thought I would be fooling my own countrymen. They are prepared to believe anything about EU bureaucracy.

heini

6:20 pm on Apr 1, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



>I figured all Germans had their guard up on April 1
After 3 hours of sleep it´s hard to be on your guard. Next thing to happen after my first response was my little daughter bringing me a cup of coffee with LOTS of salt in it. Good morning!

Rumbas

8:56 am on Apr 2, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Administrator 10+ Year Member Top Contributors Of The Month



Arrgh! You got me :)

These monday mornings the guard is down and Rencke's posts are usually valid.
Didn't get it until french fries and glory came up.

Good one!

georged

10:36 am on Apr 2, 2001 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I still believe it.
It's just too like the EU.

backus

11:52 am on Apr 2, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Got you on the: "on expensive search engine optimizers" bit. I didn't think you would really call us optimizers...errr....I mean expensive. :-) Well done. I was once fooled by the 1402 Eurotunnel which they claimed to have discovered from Dover castle to Calais!

backus

11:54 am on Apr 2, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



By the way, since when did WmW have reporters??? :) How much do they pay? ;)

mivox

8:37 pm on Apr 2, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



my little daughter bringing me a cup of coffee with LOTS of salt in it. Good morning!

Ack! LOL... aren't kids grand? My BF's kids aren't allowed in the kitchen alone. Hope your day improved after that! :)

rencke

9:11 am on Apr 3, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



>By the way, since when did WmW have reporters??? How much do they pay?

We've had lots of reporters here since Day 1. The pay is lousy. When did you last see as paycheck from WmW? Me, neither.

backus

9:20 am on Apr 3, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Hmmm, very true. Not to worry. Maybe one day, eh?

heini

9:33 am on Apr 3, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



>. Hope your day improved after that! :)
Yes quite so. Did some demolishing of furniture, some chainsaw-work....aah, I love that kind of work!
(No, not what you think, we are going to move to a new house, had to get rid of stuff before):)

backus

9:36 am on Apr 3, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Ah, to move house! :) I'm having trouble finding a flat to rent in Prague! :( It wouldn't be so bad staying in the flat I'm in, but the electricity is so bad, I'm afraid of spiking my HDD!

rencke

11:00 am on Apr 3, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



>some chainsaw-work....aah, I love that kind of work

Making note to self: Remember to be nice and polite to heini.

heini

11:40 am on Apr 3, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



rencke, I always thought you guys from sweden were all masters of the chainsaw, spending your pasttimes cutting trees...no?

rencke

4:04 pm on Apr 3, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Yes, heini. Of course, heini. Whatever you say, heini.

heini

6:01 pm on Apr 3, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



well really I´m such a nice and mellow person, couldn´t hurt anybody!
I mean as long as people know how to behave themselfes and do not play tricks on me of course...

backus

8:06 am on Apr 4, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Heini, is your chainsaw a Husqvana? If so, that should make Renke happy! :)

heini

8:34 am on Apr 4, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Now here come the real freaks :)
Backus, I think we should stop this chainsaw talk, we don´t want to scare people away from the european forum, do we?

backus

8:55 am on Apr 4, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Oh well, maybe you're right. How about drills?

heini

9:44 am on Apr 4, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



What kind of films do you watch?!
Or ist it drilling down INFORMATION, you are talking about?

backus

9:49 am on Apr 4, 2001 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Of course!