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Americans

Why do they do it?

         

PhraSEOlogy

6:51 am on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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Hello all,

I got a wonderful reminder today of the kindness of Americans. I went to look at an old pick-up truck I wanted to buy and had the hood up to check the engine etc. As I stood looking at the engine a guy pulled up alongside me and said "you need any help?". No thanks I replied. But what a nice gesture.

As a Brit (living in the USA), I have always been inspired by American hospitality. Am I the only one? Or have other people had similar experinces?

grandpa

7:49 am on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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>> Am I the only one?

No you aren't. I was stuck in Cincinatti and the hospitality of the locals was impressive. I say that because, with rare exception, such generosity is usually found in rural America. The cities can be a jungle.

Why do they do it?

My daddy did it.. good enough for me.

BeeDeeDubbleU

7:51 am on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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Yes. They are nice people <snip>

[edited by: lawman at 9:45 am (utc) on Aug. 10, 2005]

PhraSEOlogy

8:19 am on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



Grandpa,

Maybe if more folk thought like your Dad the world would be a better place.

[edited by: lawman at 9:46 am (utc) on Aug. 10, 2005]
[edit reason] speeling [/edit]

MatthewHSE

1:51 pm on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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I remember getting stranded once, on a blazing hot day, just outside Richmond, Indiana. As we hiked down the interstate trying to reach the nearest town, a couple in an RV stopped to pick us up and give us a lift into Richmond. It was deliciously air-conditioned and they were very friendly. It took about ten minutes to get into town, so they saved us a pretty long walk and possibly prevented a few cases of severe heat exhaustion.

My grandfather, who is a skilled mechanic, used to carry around practically a whole car in the back of his station wagon. Several times he was able to stop and help someone get on the road again by digging around for the right spare part and then spending an hour or so putting it in. He never took any money for this. A friend of mine, a volunteer firefighter, always has a huge pack of first-aid equipment with him. He's been able to help a lot of people alongside the road in emergency situations, before the regular emergency workers can get there.

It's done because it's just common courtesy. If you see someone in trouble, the natural impulse is to try to help if you can.

gopi

5:07 pm on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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As a indian immigrant living in America i can relate to what you say PhraSEOlogy

httpwebwitch

5:20 pm on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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perhaps Americans (as a stereotype) have an undeserved reputation for antisocial selfishness. The difference is whether you are dealing with an institution or with "the people". When you're stranded among Americans, you will be warmly accomodated. Deal with an American bank or government office, and that's a very different story. My experience as a foreigner dealing with the IRS was less-than-pleasant.

httpwebwitch

5:26 pm on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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yet even among beurocracy of American institutions, you encounter the nicest people. I find it charming when a government employee answers the phone, "How can I help y'all today?" and responds "Honey, that form needs to be notarized. You just get down to the consolate and stand in line with everyone else, Sugar."

lawman

8:57 pm on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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>>"Honey, that form needs to be notarized. You just get down to the consolate and stand in line with everyone else, Sugar."

Some people can't stand it when someone talks to them that way.

Me? I like it. :)

DXL

9:53 pm on Aug 10, 2005 (gmt 0)

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I live in the South, compared to other places I've been in the country (or world for that matter), people are more likely to be interactive. Down here, you can be waiting in line at the grocery store and someone's going to talk to you like they know you. Getting helped isn't always a given, though, I speak from being stranded in my car a few times.

But there's a reason its called "Southern Hospitality"

Hawkgirl

2:13 am on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

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Years ago when my mother was driving alone along a highway, her car had a blowout (lost a tire) and she had to pull over. Almost immediately, a man pulled over to help her change her tire. When she tried to pay him for his help, he responded, "No thanks, Ma'am. Just please tell your husband if he ever sees a woman who needs help, to go ahead and give her a hand."

Very excellent.

Another one I remember from my younger days: my mother was working nights (nurse) and I was alone one evening. It began snowing as my father was on his way home from work. The phone rang, I answered. "Hello, is this Erika?" a strange man asked. "Yes," I replied, slightly frightened. "Hello there, I'm the BanjoMan. I'm just calling to let you know your father is stuck in traffic on the highway but is on his way home. He couldn't get to a phone but he had his CB radio so he asked if someone would call you to let you know. You can let him know the BanjoMan relayed the message. Have a nice evening. Your Daddy will be home as soon as he can."

digitalghost

3:26 am on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

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I moved to the "South" because I was tired of Northern culture. I ran head-on into culture shock. People down here want to meet you, talk to you, get to know your kids. They'll call you at 5 A.M. to let you know your cows got loose, then they'll stay home from work to help you catch them. They call after storms, they call to let you know they saw a strange truck in the neighborhood, and they visit.

After they get to know you, they want to meet everyone you know, talk about history, talk about family, and down here, they aren't ashamed, even when they're 50, or 60, to talk about "Daddy". Or "Momma". "Family", means quite a bit.

When a stranger will stop his truck on the way to work to help you catch a stray donkey, well, he becomes a friend, in a "Southern Sense", which, by the way, means, he's almost kin.

And, there's no shortage of "yes m'am, and yessir's down here. Culture shock? Oh yeah. Ignorance? Hardly. Manners might not permit direct confrontation, but "Southern", doesn't mean stupid.

For me, "Southern", means an emphasis on family, folk and friends. It's a goal I aspire too. Fortunately, many Americans, aspire to the same ideals. If your truck breaks down around Dog Branch, you're likely to get your truck fixed, and a meal. And maybe, a trip on a horse, and likely, an invite back.

I'd like to think all Americans think like that, and to my relief, many of them do...

BeeDeeDubbleU

8:14 am on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

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Another one I remember from my younger days: my mother was working nights (nurse) and I was alone one evening. It began snowing as my father was on his way home from work. The phone rang, I answered. "Hello, is this Erika?" a strange man asked. "Yes," I replied, slightly frightened. "Hello there, I'm the BanjoMan. I'm just calling to let you know your father is stuck in traffic on the highway but is on his way home. He couldn't get to a phone but he had his CB radio so he asked if someone would call you to let you know. You can let him know the BanjoMan relayed the message. Have a nice evening. Your Daddy will be home as soon as he can.

Changed days, eh? Nowadays I cannot imagine anyone announcing to a bunch of strangers that their daughter was home alone :(

vincevincevince

9:48 am on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

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From this thread it seems like us Brits have the wrong end of the stick about you Americans. Maybe the media don't show the everyday kindness of individuals, but pretty much all we hear are lobbiests/corruption, law suits (over anything), crime rates (soaring), and how you're best advised not to even drive in some parts of town. Shame on the media for only focusing on the big stories.

BeeDeeDubbleU

10:23 am on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

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Having been in the US on several occasions both for business purposes and for holidays I can honestly say that in general I have found the Yanks (generic UK term for anyone from the USA) to be some of the nicest people I have met. I know that they also have their fair share of AHs but in general I find that they are far more polite and welcoming than people in the UK, particularly as someone suggested, in the southern states.

I was also privileged to work with many Yanks over here (Scotland) and strangely enough they thought the exact opposite. This led me to wonder if people are treated differently if they are guests in a country. Is it just that we make a wee bit more effort if we know that people are strangers?

[edited by: lawman at 12:15 pm (utc) on Aug. 11, 2005]
[edit reason] See your sticky [/edit]

grandpa

10:26 am on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

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all we hear are lobbiests/corruption, law suits, crime rates, and how you're best advised not to even drive in some parts of town.

I used to observe the local 6:00pm news would sign off with a 'Feel Good' story... man rushes to rescue, dog saves lives, justice in the end... the rest of the news was the same as what you hear. That 30 second snippet was not enough to offset the damage done by the 'real' news ;) Maybe helping someone else is my way of saying 'it ain't all that bad'.

wyweb

1:59 pm on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)



My experience as a foreigner dealing with the IRS was less-than-pleasant.

My experience as a US citizen has been less than pleasant in dealing with the IRS.

American friendliness, and I'm speaking very generally here, can be equated fairly accurately with location. The further you get away from the cities, the more you get off the main roads and into the rural, the friendlier people are. This is not to say that everyone living in a large American city is a butthead because that wouldn't be true. There is a butthead mentality that is prevelant in EVERY large metropolitan area though, and I think that the good often get swallowed up in that. Too many people all invading each others space, crowded freeways, high crime rates and bad air to breathe. It's no wonder they're buttheads.

Go to the country and you'll see true American hospitality. Generous hospitality. The "come into my house and stay for a while" kind of hospitality. This is what I like about my country.. not just the fact that I also happen to be an American but because of the enduring, open-handed willingness of its people to help each other, and others, when that need presents itself.

*play "Star Spangled Banner" and exit left...*

MatthewHSE

2:18 pm on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

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I just happened to remember another pretty impressive instance in which people showed uncommon generousity. My brother, grandparents and I were attending a hot air balloon festival in Lincoln, Illinois. When the balloons took off, one didn't lift off very high and the wind was blowing it toward some power lines. The pilot was obviously preoccupied with something on the ground (we found out later that he'd realized he still had the keys to the van his chase crew was to drive and was trying to throw them down to someone he knew) and didn't notice the danger until it was too late. He gave a long burst of flame out of the burner, and the balloon started to rise, but not enough. With the gondola about ten feet off the ground, the balloon crashed against the power lines, resulting in a tremendous explosion as the wires shorted out against one another. The gondola swung under the wires as the balloon, still reacting to the heat from the long burner blast, continued to rise, pulling the men in the gondola up toward the wires. And here's where the heroism of the spectators became apparent.

The area underneath where all this was happening was crowded thick with people. The above sequence took only a few seconds, but as soon as the people realized what was going on, they immediately crowded together directly under the balloon. Stretching their arms up as high as they could, they shouted for the men to jump and they would catch them. The men in the gondola, already badly burned by a few of the explosions that had taken place, did not need to be asked twice. From a height of at least ten or fifteen feet, one of the men took a flying leap out of the gondola, and was caught and safely guided to the ground by the crowd. Unfortunately he was a big man, and when his weight left the gondola, it shot upward. The second man jumped out from a height of over twenty feet, but was still caught by the crowd of people below.

I don't know about anyone else, but I think it's pretty heroic to ask a 200+ pound guy to jump down on you from that high up! The crowd probably saved the lives of the pilot and his passenger; I sure had expected to see them get cooked right before my eyes. The thing is, I highly doubt anyone in the crowd even thought about the possibility of getting hurt. When you're in that kind of situation, and I believe this goes for most cultures, not just Americans, you just do what needs to be done.

Both the pilot and the passenger were okay, except for a large areas of flash burns over their backs. The balloon eventually made it over the wires, blew across the street, and got hung up on the wires there. The fire department and power company spent the rest of the evening getting it down, and it was rather a melencholy sight to see that big red balloon, split and black down one side, hanging on an electrical pole all limp and blowing lightly in the breeze.

pmkpmk

9:01 pm on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

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Flew into San Francisco. Took the bus downtown. Exited closest to my hotel. Stood for 30 seconds, orienting myself, looking for the streetsigns, aligning it with my map. Got adressed by a middle aged white woman who asked whether I need help, whether I was looking for my hotel, and if she may assist. She didn't knew the hotel, but she knew the street and said she had almost the same way so she would like to guide me there. Which she did.

coopster

10:27 pm on Aug 11, 2005 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Administrator 10+ Year Member




httpwebwitch said...
My experience as a foreigner dealing with the IRS was less-than-pleasant.

hehe -- most natives do too ;)

ronin

12:30 pm on Aug 12, 2005 (gmt 0)

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I hope I'm not the only one here who thinks that when kindness to strangers becomes something to marvel about, it's something of a sad day.

Most news we read about and see on television ought to be bad. That's what makes it news. If good events were newsworthy, what kind of an awful planet would be living on?

MatthewHSE

1:30 pm on Aug 12, 2005 (gmt 0)

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<applause> Well said, ronin. But it's still nice to think from time to time about the good things people do.

Although I'd say it's more accurate to say that unusual things is a better definition of newsworthy events than just bad things.

wyweb

2:08 pm on Aug 12, 2005 (gmt 0)



I hope I'm not the only one here who thinks that when kindness to strangers becomes something to marvel about, it's something of a sad day.

No, you're not. I like hearing about the good man does for his fellow man though. It's a shot in the arm for me, a means of shoring up my faith in human nature.

PhraSEOlogy

10:04 pm on Aug 16, 2005 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



Liitle addition to this post.

Just got a flat tire and the local tire guy fixed it for me. When I went to pay he said "no charge sir". Come back and see us if you need us for anything and gave me his business card.

Southern hospitality - y'all gotta love it!

SEOMike

5:32 am on Aug 18, 2005 (gmt 0)

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Growing up in Des Moines Iowa we used to have "blue star" houses. These were "safe" places for kids / people to go if they were in trouble. I believe the police department checked out the people (mostly retired folk) and gave them the stars. These houses came in handy SEVERAL times as a kid after being hurt falling from a tree / bike / skateboard / rope swing or anything else requiring a band-aid and a nice glass of iced tea while my parents came to take my broken butt home. I sure loved this program. That speaks volumes to the kindness of people.

Growing up in the Midwest meant dark trips on secluded highways. Once my little sister and I were riding with my mom to visit my grandparents (not sure where my dad was) and we got a flat. Of course it was POURING rain and freezing cold (October I think) and a wonderful old man stopped to change the tire for my mom... not just help. He made her get back in the car with us to keep us calm. Sure wish I knew his name.

My grandfather was a farmer and several times people would come to his house asking to use his phone because they had accidentally driven into the ditch and gotten stuck. Every time my grandpa would fire up the tractor (didn't matter what time of night) and go pull them out and send them on their way instead of making them have a tow truck come all the way out.

My other grandfather's neighbor's house exploded in some freak gas leak accident. It was the middle of the night and blasted all of the windows out one side of my grandpa's house. He didn't waste any time running in to his neighbor's house to help them get their kids out... and he was 73 at the time.

These are just a few of the stories I know about, but people have been so wonderful to my family when they have been in need that I would happily do the same. I was an EMT for a while and I carry a med kit in my car "just in case". I've only used it twice. I also carry a small kit for easy fixes to cars.

Americans are a great people. We will come together and help each other when needed, and we come together into a HUGE community when it counts (aid to the tsunami victims for example)

I'm proud to be an American and the American spirit flourishes.

[edited by: trillianjedi at 12:07 pm (utc) on Aug. 19, 2005]
[edit reason] Toning down potential politics ;-) [/edit]

ronin

12:28 pm on Aug 19, 2005 (gmt 0)

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we come together into a HUGE community when it counts (aid to the tsunami victims for example)

Let's keep things in perspective.

http://www.alertnet.org/thefacts/aidtracker/ [alertnet.org]

The United States is the biggest tsunami donor with a total $2.34 billion of government and private pledges. But Norwegians gave the most on a per capita basis, with combined governmental and private donations amounting to $59 per head -- seven times more than Americans and 10 times more than Japanese.

pmkpmk

2:13 pm on Aug 20, 2005 (gmt 0)

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The OTHER side of Americans:

I spent a few days in a Youth (ahem) hostel in Fulda, Germany. As you may have heard of, there is the "World Youth Day" in Cologne, Germany this weekend, where the Pope is present too.

Well, a few days ago two busloads of Americans arrived at the youth hostel - it was their final stop before going to Cologne. They called themselves pilgrims, and they spent the evening in the cathedral of Fulda for an extended Mass.

However, when they came into the hostel, they acted as if they OWNED the place! Apart from my wife and my two small kids there were only a few other guests. But the visitors from the US (mostly from Chicago and San Francisco) simply didn't care. Each floor of the hostel had 4 washrooms, two for men and two for women. They re-labelled ALL the washrooms on the upper two floors being "Women only!", and only the washrooms in the basement were left for men. Even my 6 year old son had to go to the basement.
When they returned from Mass at about midnight, they SLAMMED the doors, and it took about half an hour with constant slamming until they seemed to have found their rooms.
In the morning, they didn't manage to organize washing/showering - so the washrooms were constantly occupied, while at the same time they raided the breakfast room, placing their rucksacks on chairs and tables occupying almost every space while at the same time mindlessly emptying bowls and baskets even if a kid patiously waits next to them to als get a slice of cheese or a lump of sugar.

To sum it up, they behaved like a horde of barbarians. They fulfilled every single clichee of the obnoxious, uncaring US tourist.

And keep in mind: they called themselves as being on a Christian pilgrimage!

Kirby

3:04 pm on Aug 20, 2005 (gmt 0)

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Its amazing how we buy into media stereotypes and then are so surprised when the stereotype is debunked. We could substitute most any country for the US in this thread and still share similar stories. Human kindness has no national origin.