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Best Joke

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wavebird23

2:04 am on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



Recently, the following joke was voted the funniest in the world:
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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services.

He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"
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What do you think of it? Do you know of any better ones?

Macguru

2:11 am on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



>>Recently,

So it won it 5 years in a row? ;)

pmac

2:25 am on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



hehe......Macguru's response was funnier.

HelenDev

8:41 am on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



It's not all that great, I know some way funnier ones than that. Sadly none of them repeatable here...

TheDoctor

10:10 am on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



It was judged to be the funniest by Americans. Other nationalities chose other jokes.

basenotes

2:18 pm on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



Don't mean to be picky but.. This joke was found funniest by the US:

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A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course.
One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long
funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in
mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in
prayer. His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and
touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.” The man
then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”

------

The results by each country can be found here:
[laughlab.co.uk...]

mat

2:48 pm on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



That was voted the funniest joke in the UK? Jeez, who voted? I'm British, so I can say this ... that is a crap joke.

TheDoctor

10:02 pm on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



basenotes, that's a different survey you've quoted to the one I remember.

BTW, that joke you quoted was to be found on a Donald McGill postcard back in the 1930s. I think it's one of the ones that George Orwell quotes in his famous essay on McGill.

PS I liked the Sherlock Holmes one the best, which is the one quoted as the world's favourite (on the press release page).

DrDoc

10:12 pm on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Did you know that 3 out of every 4 people make up 75% of the world's population?

digitalghost

10:13 pm on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Or that exposure to lab technicians may cause cancer in laboratory animals?

DrDoc

10:20 pm on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



...or that 84.2% of all statistics are completely made up.

sem4u

10:43 pm on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



No, it's 92.6% ;)

Macguru

11:23 pm on Jun 11, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



I like funny pics : Black hat SEO [prankplace.com].

KeithDouglas

3:11 pm on Jun 14, 2004 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



Did you know that 3 out of every 4 people make up 75% of the world's population?

Most people don't know that. You have to understand, when it comes to intelligence, half of the world's population ranks below the median.

DrDoc

5:04 pm on Jun 15, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef...

What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef...

What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter... He won't come when you call anyway...

;)

TheDoctor

7:26 pm on Jun 16, 2004 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



If we're quoting jokes that old...

What's green and races around the garden at eighty miles per hour?
An E-type cucumber.

Why do ducks have flat feet?
To stamp out forest fires.

Why do elephants have flat feet?
To stamp out burning ducks.