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Does anyone work with their wife?

Thinking about bringing her in

         

Big_Balou

4:30 am on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



Well it seems as if the wife is about burnt out of her current job, consultant for one of the big boys....you see their commercials all the time. She has been on the road almost constantly for a couple of years and just wants a change.

As the title ask are there any SOSO, spouse or significant other, teams? How do you fare at working together?

I can see the upside in that she has a different point of view and a skill set I do not have. But I can see the downside of two type A personalties working closely on the same thing.

tigger

4:51 am on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



yep me, although I'm the boss :) I've been working with the wife for 6 years, friends wonder how we do it living and working together but we do pretty well and so far its not effected our marriage other than in the morning over breakfast we talk about PR & links :)

Ivana

6:07 am on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I've just started working with my hubby. I've wanted to for a while but I had to finish my MA thesis first.

I think it's very important to sit down and talk about what you both want from the working relationship, its limitations etc. For me it's very important that I'm not 'the wife who helps out', I want to be an equal partner. I mean I didn't spend over 6 years in further education to assist my husband in his business, I do this because I find it interesting and because my skills are relevant.

4crests

6:25 am on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Yup, I work with my wife. Our website has been online since 1994. I delayed showing her how do things because I thought it was going to take me forever to teach her everything. She really knew nothing about computers or the internet. Boy was I wrong. She learned everything faster than I could have imagined. It has been less than a year and she now does many of our website tasks better than me. I've been absolutely amazed. I guess I'm not as irreplacable as I thought. It definitely has it's hard parts, but overall it's really worth it.

At first it didn't matter as much, but the last couple years i've started to worry about what would happen if i were in an accident and suddenly died or something. I now feel sure that she could run things just fine without me. It has really given me peace of mind.

I just wish we would have started together back in 1994. We could be lightyears ahead right now!

Big_Balou

2:15 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



She has shown an interest off and on but if she starts I want a full partner. I think that is my real reservation right now.

I showed her enough to be dangerous when she wanted to make a site for a group she's in. So how quickly she picks up would not be an issue but we found out early on that it is best if we don't teach each other, I sat in on one of her tutoring sessions for Calculus one time and she earned the nickname Lil' General...not easily takin to being in the students seat.

I don't know, nothing is final yet but I'm thinking hard about it. It would be nice to both be working from home.

rogerd

2:35 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Administrator 10+ Year Member



A lot depends on your relationship and the state of the business, IMO. Some couples seem to work together well, with no squabbling or marriage impact. The danger can be carrying business arguments home or personal issues to the business. Just as marriages often encounter difficulties if there are money problems, I could imagine being in business with one's spouse could get tricky if the business is severely stressed by finances, employee problems, errors, too MUCH business, etc.

Years ago, I used to participate in road rallies. You could always spot the husband/wife teams - they were the ones shouting at each other as they exited the car: "You missed the turn!" "I wouldn't have missed it if you had told me to look for it!" "I DID tell you, you weren't paying attention! You never listen!" ... While other teams made errors, too, in most cases they were civil to each other; there seemed to be less of a barrier for married folks to be overtly critical of each other.

jamesa

4:29 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



On the plus side, who can you trust more? As long as both of your expectations are in sync. The thing to watch out for in a hubby/wife home business is separating home from work. It's too easy to let your work life consume you, then the relationship suffers.

dragonlady7

5:22 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I've thought of it but one of the main reasons I want to work from home is that I work so much better on my own. If he's home, too, I want to chatter with him and play with him. And we do better if we have a break from each other once in a while-- sure we email all day, but we are in different places and that's better.
I would work part-time with him, but not full-time. We work decently together, but not for hours on end. Just once in a while.

We know this because we've discussed it. Discussing it is important, as is being entirely up front and honest with yourself and each other about every aspect of the whole procedure. If there are going to be problems with silly emotions like jealousy, pride, etc., it's important to know; you can't help silly emotions no matter how silly.
So... you need eyes to be wide open, and discussion open even wider.

pmac

5:44 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Yup, we work together. Started out sharing my office, felt the need for more elbow room so she moved downstairs.

All in all it works pretty well. Cabin fever starts to set in by Febuary when the snow is over our heads and the temp. is -40c.

We do a pretty good job of keeping business and home life as seperate as possible......She does her thing, I do mine. We feel real lucky to be able to both work from home, it's a real treat.

rcjordan

5:45 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Yes, in several businesses. We divide up the duties; I handle the macro stuff and she handles the details that I tend to dismiss out-of-hand (like billing, deposits, etc.). Works great.

jennifer

8:21 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



My husband joined my business when his last corporate employer went out of business. It has been the best move we made.

We find it best (probably since we have very different working styles) if we work in separate locations. He has his computers set up in one room, I have mine set up in another. Quite often, we don't see each other during the day - even though we are in the same house.

Good Luck

bunltd

9:02 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



We work together at home. My husband for 3+ years, for me it's been 7 years. We enjoy it very much and find it hard to imagine doing things any other way.

It is a ongoing process. We each have particular areas where we do the majority of the work, but we have some overlap as well. Take some time to think about how you want to do things, and put some basic systems in place to help you keep track of everything. Make sure you are in agreement on the division of labor - duties, responsibilities, etc. It really will make a difference.

You can do it, just go into it with open eyes and an open mind.

LisaB

Lilliabeth

9:11 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I have worked with my husband for years, first at home, and now at our "store front". We do great. We even have a long commute together!

Life is short. I want to spend my days with the person who loves me the most.

We are able to remain professional around others... I suspect co-workers sometimes forget we're married. I don't think we are any more or any less likely than any other co-workers to quarrel at work. We do sometimes message love notes and meet in the back hallway. ;)

I have twice known couples where it didn't look like it was working out for them. In both cases, though, it was one person working hard and the other not. That'll break up any partnership.

I'd say to go into it agreeing to scrap the plan if it interfered with your marriage, but speaking of failure and "Plan B" often leads to failure and "Plan B". Don't make a "Plan B". Plan to enjoy it. :)

jbinbpt

9:17 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



We both work for the same company. It's hard to keep business and home seperate. It is NOT a situation that I would recommend for the faint hearted. You have to draw firm lines not to cross. We have had some big fights, but we work it out. The worst situation is keeping private info to ourselfs.
jb

AAnnAArchy

9:29 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



My partner & I work together at home. Our computers are in different rooms, so we go for long periods of time without seeing each other. It's been about five years of working together and I don't think we've ever had a big disagreement about anything. I think it helps a lot if both people are easygoing.

We do end up discussing work all the time, but we like what we do, so it's the same as most people discussing their hobbies.

I doubt other people work the way we do, but my partner does all of the design/coding stuff and I basically read message boards for a living. ;) I find out information and she implements it. I know that must sound strange to other people - does anyone else work this way?

EliteWeb

9:30 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Don't do it if they havent seen you work before and see you get stressed or pissed off. Cool thing bout work is you can leave it and go home to yer loved ones, when you work with them the stress will follow you around.

Conard

10:06 pm on Oct 20, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I've been working in the same business with my wife since 1979. We never argue about any business issues.
Over time we found our strengths and weakness in our places in our business and switched jobs several times to make things move more smoothly.
We do have enough room so we aren't under each others feet all the time and discuss business moves most of the day.
Shhhhh....If we weren't doing what we do as a team I'm afraid I would be looking for a "real" job somewhere.

GodLikeLotus

7:11 pm on Nov 13, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I have working with my wife for the last 4 years, however, one thing for sure is "I am the boss". She does understand her terms of employment and we do work well although strange hours.

Makes "Sex in the office" that bit more acceptable and more often.