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50 Ways to Leave Your ... Job?

Creative Exit Strategies

         

rogerd

5:19 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Administrator 10+ Year Member



An affilated company just had an employee leave in an unusual manner - she said she had to carry a box out to the trash, and was then going to go to lunch. When she hadn't returned after a few hours, they looked around and found a resignation note on her desk. The "trash" she was removing were her personal effects. Guess she wanted to avoid actually telling anyone. Over the years, I've had a few after-lunch no-shows, but this lady was a bit more creative than the rest.

Since this is a pseudo-Friday in the US (due to the 4th of July holiday), and Fridays are when WebmasterWorld members are wont to ramble on about random topics... have YOU had used or encountered any unusual exit strategies?

I'll even contribute another one. A few years ago, a field sales guy (in a remote city) got tipped that he was going to be fired. Wanting to maximize the duration of his employment, he didn't answer his phone when he thought his boss was calling. He kept calling in when he knew he'd miss his boss, and left voicemails returning the boss's calls, commenting on customer visits, etc. He kept kept this game going for a week before they finally tracked him down & gave him the official news.

Your turn... :)

dragonlady7

5:44 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I've heard a couple good ones but of course can't remember any now... When I worked in a convenience store I had about 4 new employees that were supposed to replace me simply walk out and not come back (apparently pretty typical exit method for the industry)-- the boss knew I was leaving pretty soon, and was just waiting for a replacement. Finally I wrote him a lengthy apology letter and said I'd be gone in 3 weeks, and he let me go the next day. *shrug*

You always hear about people winning the lottery and then doing horrible things to their bosses as they quit. Such fantasies have sustained me through a few tough days recently. But I have to wonder, does anyone actually do that?

Someday I'd like to quit a job in a dramatic fashion. I'm thinking something involving a helicopter...

On a side note, where does the word "fire" come from in its verb form? Surely there isn't an ancient English tradition of setting fire to unwanted employees... I'm a language geek and ought to know this one but I don't. Any guesses?

choster

6:55 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



From www.etymonline.com
The v. sense of "sack, dismiss" is first recorded 1885 in Amer.Eng., probably from a play on the two meanings of discharge: "to dismiss from a position," and "to fire a gun," the second sense being from "set fire to gunpowder," attested from 1530.

dragonlady7

7:04 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



All right! The Internet rules. :-) I'll have to check out that site sometime.

Vampyre

9:41 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I haven't used any creative exit strategies, but I did want to on my last day at work in a fast food restaurant. The entire shift, I was just waiting for a rude customer, so I could throw their attitude back in their face, and then when they threaten to complain, I'd just inform them that it's my last day anyways. But as luck would have it, it was a very slow night, and the only customers I had were a few regulars.

Marcia

9:55 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Problem is that if you get let go you can collect unemployment insurance but if you quit (unless it's for a good reason) you can't collect.

Quitting with high drama is one thing, and there's kind of a satisfaction and a charge to it. Pretty much no one quits without having good reason and sometimes it can call for a grand exit with a flourish.

It can take a lot of creative strategizing to get them to sack you, though. Sometimes it can be like a staring contest. They're waiting for the employee to quit, the employee is waiting for them to sack him, and neither one will give in. Sometimes it's for spite, and that's when it really gets into gamesmanship.

dcheney

10:21 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

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I've heard several stories of folks in the telephone-based tech support area that simply put the customer on hold and walked out the door, never to return.

Stretch

10:38 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



Doesn't exactly fit with leaving your job but definitely fits with creative exit strategies...

When I handed in my notice to my employer at my first 'proper' job he expressed concern over training my replacement. I agreed to work for an additional month as a trainer so long as I got paid a trainer salary. They were happy and we agreed the deal - verbally.

When it came to my last day I had about 3 months of salary due, including the 'trainer bonus' and holiday pay and I was all set for a couple of months doing sweet FA.

I went to see the personnel manager for my pay cheque who presented me with a written document showing how I owed them £10. Aaaagh!

That was the first - and last - verbal contract for me.

Funnily enough, they agreed to forfeit the £10 because of my good service. How nice. And how creative...

rogerd

11:55 pm on Jul 3, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Administrator 10+ Year Member



The comment about the customer service rep putting someone on hold and leaving reminds me of a restaurant I frequented. One morning, everything seemed to be taking a long time, and toast was not delivered after 20 minutes. When I quizzed the waitress, she informed me that the chef had just quit a few minutes earlier.

Must be something about restaurants... in another one, our waitress seemed to be taking a really long time to check on us. Another waitress came by and asked if she could help. When we told her we hadn't seen our waitress in a while, she said, "We haven't seen her either. She may have quit." (Er, that's "server" to you PC types... :))

mack

1:37 am on Jul 4, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Administrator 10+ Year Member Top Contributors Of The Month



Well this is something I did.
I was fed up being messed about so I wrote a nice resignation letter and went into the office to deliver it. Explained the situation. My manager was ok about it and I received a good referance, but then I caught a glance of the person who had caused the problems. He was the top man in the company, and was just back from a short spell of faternity leave.

Boss man:"I hear you handed in your resignation?"
Mack:"Yep all done, Hear youre wife had a little girl"
Pause
Mack:"Have you found out who the father is yet?"

Brushed past him as I heard his jaw hit the floor.

Mack.

Mike12345

8:00 am on Jul 4, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



"have you found out who the father is yet?" -lol! thats ones a good un'

When i worked nights in a supermarket, i told the store manager that i knew about his "secret". (of the sordid sexual type) and he informed me that i didnt need to resign as i was fired.

Anyway it ended up that i worked a weeks notice, and got my pay etc. so it all worked out well.

Im planning my next exit soon, so any tips welcome ;) I like the idea of a helicopter, care to elaborate on that one dragonlady?

Skylo

11:06 am on Jul 4, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



We fired an employee, he came in at 8 in the morning and he was told his services were not needed. H e proceeded to grab his stuff and sneakily dropped a huge file size email on our server causing it to crash badly and putting us out of business for 2 days!

Not sure how servers work so excuse the basic explanation:-)

BlobFisk

11:54 am on Jul 4, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



What is employment law like around the world, vis a vis notice periods?

In Ireland, it is generally 4 weeks as the minimum (although, I believe that legally it is your payment interval).

Woz

12:11 pm on Jul 4, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



An acquaintance of mine, we'll call him Jim, had handed in his notice and was working his last days out under the scrutiny of a very time-conscious and overbearing boss.

Having decided he had endured enough domineering behavior from said boss, Jim decided to arrive very late one morning making a raucous entrance past the boss's door.

"Oi!, your an hour late!" came the bellow.

Jim poked his head around the office door and said "No problem, I'll balance it up by leaving an hour early."

Jim was left to work the final days on his own terms.

Onya
Woz

killroy

12:49 pm on Jul 4, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



I once hired an ex-fellow student from uni. After about a year, he went back to uni. He was payed prettyprincely for his qualifications, and at the time he left he was owed around a months pay.

We were short at the tiem and assured him we would pay as we could, all this was very informal.

Turns out most of the data entry work he was suposed to have done was partial and incomplete and caused as a lot of work to figure out what exactly was missing (accounting stuff!).

Now, whenever we meet we're getting along jsut fine, he doesn't mention the money and I don't mention the shabby work. My only problem is my bloody conscience is tugging at me all along. Currently that money would hurt a lot and I can't really pay, but I want to when it'S not so critical anymore.

Anybody have similar issues with ex employees? Although I'd guess employment to be much more formal in most countries/situations.

SN

HowlingWizard

2:39 pm on Jul 4, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I spent just over a year leading development on a major upgrade on an internal application (and supporting the business unit with the exisiting system). Our Manager kept talking about moving my group to a location in the middle of the city. I kept reminding him I would quit if he move the group.

With the roll out scheduled for less than a month the manager gave two week notice of the move. I gave my two week notice. The business unit became really unhappy when the other guy with detailed knowledge of the system gave notice two weeks later.

The roll out got delayed a couple months so a consultant could come in, call us evil and get up to speed on the system.

namniboose

4:33 am on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



I was once working for a magazine with a very dominant workaholic Boss who wanted everyone to work through lunch with her during deadlines (and there was always a deadline).

One day I flipped, announced that I was going for a walk and kept on walking till I got home! (5 miles). I hadn't planned it but my legs just kept going.

My brother (who worked next door) told me he heard her jumping up and down shouting 'How dare she? How dare she?' when she realised I wasn't coming back!

DaveN

9:34 am on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



A friend of mine worked in a bank and he hated his job but there was always carrots 6 month bonus, Pay rise, target related bonus, always something to keep him there. any way one while on a break he was moaning to his girlfriend on the phone and she said flip a coin.

Heads you walk out now come home and make love
Tails you go back to work.

he flipped the coin and just walked out, two hours late he rang his boss and said " just had the best S3X ever and I not coming back to work anymore, see ya" then hung up.

the funny thing was when he flipped the coin it was tails!
Dave

lawman

11:08 am on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member Top Contributors Of The Month



the funny thing was when he flipped the coin it was tails!

I guess he took it literally. ;)

lawman

dragonlady7

12:32 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



*sigh*... I have to stay at this job for quite a while yet, I imagine. My boyfriend and I have decided we're staying put at least till February. But his boss was being very snippy on Friday, and has been making him do busy-work, writing documentation for code that's mostly documented anyway. Last night we were talking, and my boyfriend spent about an hour planning exactly what he was going to say to his boss to frighten him: "Well, the code is well-enough documented for you and me, but I guess I'd better make sure my replacement can understand it." Just a gentle reminder that he's not going to stick around forever and it's going to be hell when he leaves.
One of the employees at my current job has just given two months' notice. So I guess I'm surrounded by responsible people. And they haven't been bad enough to me for me to leave them in the lurch...
But it's a nice little daydream now and then. I really didn't realize the "professional" world was so childish, when I was a student... I should rise above and be professional the way I thought it was supposed to be. But man... it ain't easy.

satanclaus

7:17 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)



I've always wanted to get a job at a restraunt with an intercom system just so I could do Scarface's exit strategy from the movie "Half Baked"

hannamyluv

7:58 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member Top Contributors Of The Month



I once worked as a receptionist at a graphic design/animation studio. One of the artists had about 100 toys on his desk. Then one day he started taking a few home at a time. On the day he ran out of toys to take home, he didn't come back. Didn't say anything to anyone, just never came in again. The funny thing was that no one noticed until about 3 days before then that his toy collection had shunken dramatically. Even then, when asked where the toys went to, he just shrugged and said that he was cleaning up the clutter in his life.

dragonlady7

8:09 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



>he was cleaning up the clutter in his life.

I guess so!

stevegpan2

8:10 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



when l left, I told the mgr I like to go back to China for a couple of weeks. But then when I was back he emailed me later ask me to go back to work. So I went back for a week and not going back again. And he emailed again. two weeks later, company downsized 25% and all of them got 2 weeks severage pay. I regret I should have stayed 2 more weeks....

KevinC

8:15 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



Well I worked as manager for a health club for 2 years and eventually asked for a very large raise to compensate for the work I was doing.

I threatened to quit if I didn't get the raise - of course the raise did not go through, so I convinced my boss to lay me off as a favour.

Long story short since I was laid off I was eligable for retraining. The government paid me $30,000 to retrain me for a new career and my living expenses for just under a year. All free and I never had to pay back a dime.

Best move I have ever made! I felt like being very dramatic when I heard that they would not give me the raise, I'm sure glad I bit my tongue though!

nipear

8:19 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



This isn't a quiting story but...

When I was in college I worked at a soriety in the kitchen for an hour or 2 a day. We mostly served food, helped the cook, and cleaned up, an easy job in college with some very nice perks!

Anyway at the end of the year, I was handing out a bunch of eggs to some girls for some experiment or something when the cook walked in a fired me on the spot for disobeying his rules. I said fine and walked out with the girls and sat down with them for a nice lunch.

I ate at the soriety for last 3 days of the year while the cook had to do his job and mine. It was great watching my former boss squirm as I went through the buffet line ordering him around and complaigning about his horrible cooking!

lawman

10:28 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member Top Contributors Of The Month



Hey nipear, did you ever wonder what extra goodies he added to your plate? :)

lawman

Robino

11:26 pm on Jul 8, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member



Not something I'm proud of. But I was when I was 16.
I worked at a grocery store and had some real jerk bosses. After we were closed one day I took a can of lighter fluid and spilled a thin line all the way down the center of aisle ten. Then I paged "a manager" to aisle ten and when he came I lit the line. I tried to run next to it and continued into the parking lot, to my car and home.

They were REAl MAD when I came in a week later to get my check.

EBear

12:13 pm on Jul 9, 2003 (gmt 0)

10+ Year Member



On a well-known and extremely active webmasters' mailing list in this country, a prominent and oft-posting member wrote a private reply to a poster who had ranted about the incompetence and ignorance of development house bosses in general. Sympathising with the poster, and citing several specific examples within his own high-profile company, he finished with the phrase ". . . which is why I won't be working for XXX for very much longer.". He then sent the message, not to the poster as intended, but to the mailing list.

1 hour later, he was indeed no longer working for XXX. :)

lorax

12:59 pm on Jul 9, 2003 (gmt 0)

WebmasterWorld Senior Member 10+ Year Member Top Contributors Of The Month



About 15 years ago I was the CAD manager at a branch office for a small consulting engineering firm. Which meant I was in charge of drafting standards, all of the computers and thier maintenance, as well as anything electronic including the fax. I moved on to bigger and better things and the guy who replaced me was a college chum.

The company fell on hard times (poor management - the owner was a nice but inept manager) and really rode his back about workload and being billable.

They finally began talking in secret about laying him off (what's a CAD Manager do anyhow?). He got wind of it and during lunch on the day he was to be let go he enabled the password protection on all 7 computers, the plotter (a big printer) and the fax machine. They fired him right that afternoon and the next day when they turned everything on - they found out what he had done.

His phone was ringing off the hook. I heard he got a raise.

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