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3:10 am on Sep 2, 2018 (gmt 0)

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WebmasterWorld Administrator keyplyr is a WebmasterWorld Top Contributor of All Time 10+ Year Member Top Contributors Of The Month

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I was walking past a tall wooden fence the other day, you know the kind you see outside a building site. I heard chanting coming from behind the fence... "Thirteen, thirteen, thirteen, thirteen..."

As I approached I saw a small hole in the fence just big enough to look through. The hole was right where the sound appeared to be originating from.

Just as I put my eye to the hole a finger poked me in the eye!

They cheered loudly and started chanting... "Fourteen, fourteen, fourteen..."
4:42 am on Sept 2, 2018 (gmt 0)

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Ouch. Fifteen.

OK then. A man is finishing his breakfast with his eyes scanning the morning paper. His wife sitting next to him is scanning through her email when she turns to him and says,"Honey, did you know that people eat more bananas than monkeys?"
"Yeah, sounds right" he mumbles, "I don't remember the last time I ate a monkey."


I know, right...
8:15 am on Sept 2, 2018 (gmt 0)

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Two men are walking down the sidewalk talking, when they notice a big dog laying on a lawn licking himself.

"Gee, I wish I could do that!" chuckles the one guy.

The other guy says "Well, go over and pet him, maybe he'll let you."
5:37 pm on Sept 3, 2018 (gmt 0)

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Hi there keyplyr,

"...when they notice a big dog laying on a lawn licking himself."

This really needs to be specific, anatomically, to be humorous.

In polite company, I would probably have used...


"...when they notice a big dog laying on a lawn licking it's genitalia."


birdbrain
7:24 pm on Sept 3, 2018 (gmt 0)

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WebmasterWorld Senior Member tangor is a WebmasterWorld Top Contributor of All Time 10+ Year Member Top Contributors Of The Month

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After all these years the wife and I still hold hands in public.

If I let go she shops.
7:39 pm on Sept 3, 2018 (gmt 0)

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"After all these years the wife and I still hold hands in public.

If I let go she shops.

alternatively, to give a more balanced view...


"After all these years the wife and I still hold hands in public.

If she lets go I philander.


birdbrain
8:29 pm on Sept 3, 2018 (gmt 0)

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birdbrain... really?
4:40 am on Sept 4, 2018 (gmt 0)

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@birdbrain ... interesting move from economic family humor to family destruction humor. Never would have thought of that...
9:56 am on Sept 4, 2018 (gmt 0)

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Hi there tangor,



where you see "economic family humor",
I see male chauvinism in need of exposure

Male philandering, I would assume, is a far
more likely cause of "family destruction"
than female shopping.





birdbrain
11:38 am on Sept 4, 2018 (gmt 0)

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speaking of fun...
11:45 am on Sept 4, 2018 (gmt 0)

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I love flawed equivalencies. So, where would this one go>

What are three words a woman never wants to hear when she's making love? "Honey, I'm home!"
 

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