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How do I become fat?

Without popping any pills

     
11:48 am on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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I am a 28 year old male, 6'2" tall and weight just 52 kgs. That's around 100 pounds I think.

I am too lazy to exercise and I am a vegetarian. I don't like eating much anyway because I think spending time eating seems to be such a waste of time.

My general health is great - no heart attacks, no brain haemorraghes, no tiredness etc so far. I can trek up hills without problems which others huff and puff.

I hear that fat american kids munch on potato chips, cheese burgers etc all the time. Now if I do the same, will I gain weight quickly?

12:04 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Fat kids the world over; a burger probably has as much fat in Europe as it does in the States.

Generally, burgers contain meat (that's where the fat is), and so are not recommended for vegetarians (except on Tuesdays).

Vegeburgers generally consist of sweepings off the floor of the food processor; little fat, but zero flavour (unless you count cardboard), and no nutritional value.

If you really want to be even more unhealthy than "too lazy to exercise", you are going to need to do a little more research - and a little less US-bashing.

Good Luck from the UK :)

12:21 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Just follow what this guy did in the documentary "Supersize Me"
[supersizeme.com...]
12:27 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Back here, veg burgers are filled with lots of green stuff but can be ordered with extra cheese.

How do cows and buffaloes become so fat munching on grass?

12:32 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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How do cows and buffaloes become so fat munching on grass?

The kind of cattle you are talking about probably don't get much chance to munch on grass. Then they are industrially processed.

The book "Fast Food Nation" will answer many of your questions (as well as putting you off from ever going to a "fast food" place again).

12:34 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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I am 5'11 and 230 lbs. I wish I had your problem :(
12:39 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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How do I become fat?

Have you considered beer?

12:59 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Breakfast
cook 1/2 lb of bacon, drain semi-well, but don't get obsessed over the act
do it again, but give a bit to the pooch from this batch
break and drop in 4 eggs
cook sunny side up
2 tall glasses whole milk

2 large cookies and 3 scoops ice cream

Lunch
Order a large pizza, extra cheese, extra meat
have it cut into quarters
flop one quarter upside down on the other
flop one quarter upside down on the other
enjoy your two sandwiches with the bev of your choice
(make it a diet coke, ordering the bev with as straight a face as you can manage)

a 44 ounce starberry milkshake

Dinner
find a chicken fried steak place that offers the CFS in a size that fairly well covers a 12 inch plate
request extra cream gravy for both the steak and the
sides of buttery mashed potatoes
add a salad, 3 bits of lettuce drenched in full flavored dressing of choice, with some cheese on top

Blackberry cobbler, three scoops of ice cream

Repeat the above every other day, every day if you're up to it, until you're within 12 lbs of your desired weight.

There are of course other ways to gain weight, but the above has an enjoyment factor going for it that's gonna be right hard to beat, and even more difficult to stop. :)

1:02 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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I too am a vegetarian, but I will attest to the fact that there are plenty of yummy, animal-product-free foods which can still pack on pounds in a very short time.

I don't like eating much anyway because I think spending time eating seems to be such a waste of time.

Well there's the problem....

Try multitasking :)!

[edited by: MamaDawg at 1:02 pm (utc) on April 17, 2007]

1:04 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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How do you get fat? Simple: take on more calories that you burn off.

Syzygy

1:14 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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eating seems to be such a waste of time

... more I think of it this seems to be a hopeless case ;)

1:16 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Stop smoking. Took me from 10 stone to 15 stone in 6 years.
1:18 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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You can buy high calorie shakes. They dont work as well as they should but they do work!
1:29 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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I don't smoke, I don't drink beer. Eggs are okay. But what comes out out of an egg after they hatch - definitely not okay! But reading kevinpate's menu is tempting me to say "#^@* this - I want that chicken on the menu"
1:31 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Just pretty much break your legs and don't move from bed for several months that should help!
1:48 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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I think you are all missing the point - including the bloke who asked.

He clearly is proud of being in good health, so FAT isn't the issue; weight is.

But he said:

I am too lazy to exercise

His lack of weight is lack of muscle and quality, not FAT - he needs to get off his harris, avoid lame posts on forums - don't we all ;) - and DO something.

Once he builds up some muscle tone and an appetite, his problem will disappear. He's not vegan, so he cannot blame his diet.

Mind you, if he's jealous of fat kids eating cheeseburgers, the problem may go deeper :)

[added:]
The beer was a good idea; goes well with laziness.
I can vouch for that.
[/added]

[edited by: Quadrille at 1:51 pm (utc) on April 17, 2007]

1:49 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Just pretty much break your legs

I did exactly that and can state unequivocally that as a weight gaining technique this one does work.

While you're busy breaking your legs, stop smoking cold turkey and double your fun...

If for some reason none of this works you can try drinking heavily and staying out all night, then spending 10 hours a day in front of your computer. Follow that with getting divorced and relocating to the other side of the country. That one always works for me.

3:02 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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An authority site for people who think they need 2000 calories in one meal:

[swansonmeals.com...]

5:04 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Have you tried constipating yourself?
5:23 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Lots of bread with margarine, or olive oil and vinegar. Taste great and you aren't killing any animals.
5:39 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Lots of bread with margarine ... Tastes great.

Meanwhile, back on Planet Earth ... :)

5:59 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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For me I just have to go to work to put weight on, when not working say on hols or not in a contract my weight drops off.
7:41 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Just because you want to gain weight doesn't mean you should load up on sugar and fat. That'll kill a skinny dude. If you don't have heart problems and diabetes now, you will later.

Eat more bagels.

Olive oil will make you fat.

Put some oil on that bread! With a little pepper!

11:44 pm on Apr 17, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Donuts, cinnamon buns and most pastries to lay on fat. Androgel and a Bowflex to lay on muscle. Either way will do the trick.
12:49 am on Apr 18, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Fat isn't what you need - you need some muscle. I'm three inches shorter than you and weigh 105 pounds more, very little of which is fat. Honestly, at your height and weight, I don't see how you stay on your feet at all! :)

I suggest a workout program to beef yourself up. It doesn't have to take much time, and what time it does take will be well worth it.

3:36 am on Apr 18, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Redefine vegetarianism to include animals who only are vegetarian themselves. That will allow you to eat most organically produced meats. After all, if the animal has only ever eaten vegetables then it is made of vegetables.

Take such vegetarian meat, dip in batter and deep fat fry. Serve with chips three meals a day and wash down with beer.

5:23 am on Apr 18, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Most Americans are trying to lose weight, not gain it

Stay thin like Gandhi. You will out live us all!

5:54 am on Apr 18, 2007 (gmt 0)

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>>> I'm three inches shorter than you and weigh 105 pounds more

Any idea what the minimum weight should be, for my height and age? 125 lbs? 150 lbs?

>>> Redefine vegetarianism to include animals who only are vegetarian themselves

It is a religion/family thing. Can't do it.

>>> Stay thin like Gandhi. You will out live us all!

OK. But I don't want to get shot.

6:59 am on Apr 18, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Try eating a "bogan burger"

It has:
The $15.50 burger's big turkish bread roll is topped with a steak, a chicken schnitzel, a potato cake, bacon, egg, cheese, onion, pineapple and beetroot.

It has 7000 kilojoules and sounds like something Elvis would eat, I am going to try one on the weekend as the pub is not far out of the way.

Eric Bana admits to binging on fast food to prepare for his role in Chopper as the earless-one.

5:17 pm on Apr 18, 2007 (gmt 0)

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Any idea what the minimum weight should be, for my height and age? 125 lbs? 150 lbs?

You're in the 2nd percentile for weight, which means that 98% of men your height weigh more than you. I assume that you are a small framed person, and as such, your healthy weight range is roughly 150-170 lbs. If you are large-boned, you should be closer to 200 lbs.

I'm a bit taller and roughly twice your weight. A lean weight for me, with very little fat is 215.

Take a cooking class-food should be enjoyed. Start playing a physical sport, or take up weight lifting.

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