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Do all of the above for a start on getting your traffic.
BTW, is this a specific question for an affiliate site, or for a website in general?
1. In my case, back in those years, business cards where my first option to promote my sites. It prove very rewarding due to the nature of that site. Then I submitted to search engines and asked-exchanged links.
2. It took me (for my first site) about two years to get some decent and useful traffic). That was 300 unique per day for me... yes, very little but it was working good.
3. Yes, avoid advertising. I probably did the wrong choices on buying ads or perhaps the site was too little. (when you click on an ad you would be kinda disappointed or confused if the landing site is just a business card online)
Trust me, I said it before on another thread: read the webmasterworld forum and follow the rules, specially the steps for success by Tabke (the founder).
I changed my strategy and now I create good content (very hard work) and then the traffic comes faster and with better quality than with other methods.
Good luck.