Forum Moderators: not2easy
I have written ten articles in the last week and a few of them just don't look right in the third person. But I think they should all be uniform in terms of point of view.
They're articles giving advice on what to look for in a certain kind of widget. Of course they're widgets that I happen to sell.
What do y'all write in? Which is better? Who cares?
I'd worry less about "rules" and more about what sounds right and fits the context of your site and the particular article. If you want to describe some personal widget experiences, for example, using the first person would be the most comfortable. For a formal "white paper", third person would no doubt work best.
And if you hear from your English teacher, don't tell her I said you could use the second person! ;)
We all learned in English class not to write in the second person (using "you"). Well, I learned it anyway.
The object of public schools is to create content, non thinking cogs in large bureaucratic machines. I took my ritalin and am sitting still. See how still I sit?
Using the second person recognizes the humanity of your audience. You should use third person to emphasize process. I take it you are using your web site to crank users through some sort of process that gives you money. The school system has got everyone nice and trained up to make such machines work smoothly. My bosses would say we should take advantage of the training and stick with third person.
If you don't have a boss, then do what you will. You will get an occasional complaint from people who have been trained to avoid first and third person.
The object of public schools is to create content, non thinking cogs in large bureaucratic machines. I took my ritalin and am sitting still. See how still I sit?
Yep. That's why I homeschool my kids!
Using the second person recognizes the humanity of your audience. You should use third person to emphasize process.
I find that I fall into the trap of being overly formal when writing. I end up writing white papers and I'm not sure that it's what visitors want. I think I want to tone it down for my web site audience. I'll go with the second person.
I take it you are using your web site to crank users through some sort of process that gives you money.
I just want my visitors to get a lot of information. I am often suprised by what they don't know about the thing that they're trying to buy. I figure that the educated consumer spends more money.
I also want to look like I know what the heck I'm talking about. Whether or not I do is open for debate. None of my competitors in the area take this approach so I believe I'll come out looking good by comparison.
As people regain their voices, I see a growing backlash against the idiocies that rule the school system. But, I really don't know what to do about people who get upset when they see anything other than the third person. I also don't know what to do about people who've been trained to dislike "helper" verbs.
I was trained in school to avoid helper verbs like "was," "is," "be," "do," "have," "had," etc.. I was trained to only use "action words" and to never let a sentence grow longer than five words. I've decided that the helper verbs are the coolest things in the language. Using helper verbs, you can structure a sentence in time.
For example, I now like the big long run on sentence:
"I was listening to a subpar public school teacher drone on about helper verbs when I decided to stop swallowing the Ritalin they've been feeding me and to start thinking and speaking for myself."
The sentence has passive voice. It uses the evil "I" word. It has helper verbs. Man, I would have received an "F" if I put that in a term paper. But, I prefer it to:
"See Jane take pill. See Jane sit still."
The cool thing about the web is that you can write in your own voice. Those unhappy with your voice can find a voice they connect with.
I was trained in school to avoid helper verbs like "was," "is," "be," "do," "have," "had," etc.. I was trained to only use "action words" and to never let a sentence grow longer than five words.
Yeah, I've heard this one too. MS Word flags it as "passive voice". I just ignore it. Writing needs a little variety anyway. Although I've never heard of the five word thing. I have to try really hard to get a sentence under twenty words. Yikes!
You mention you've written a bunch of articles and some of them look funny in third person -- you may want to stand back & take a look at the 'voice' of your site & whether the tone is consistent & supports your overall strategy.
I've worked on sites where they've tried to be friendly & folksy & informal -- and then were incredibly stilted when it came to talking about whatever they were selling. Doesn't work very well...
As people have pointed out, you're better off suiting the use of person to the material, but using one & sticking to it gives an overall sense of the company & the product...
If you look at the content & find it's not coherent, often it's not a matter of re-doing the whole site but deciding what 'person' you'll use & then keeping it consistent...
It is therefore extremely interesting to note ( if my presumptions are correct? ) that the teachers are every bit as pedantically picky about English there as are the teachers here in France with regard to French!..
The point is to communicate ....as someone who can speak /write /read "legalease" in both languages ...I personally couldn't give a "rats ass" if you address me as you ( or tu or du ) or "vous" etc!
The target audience is what counts and those who want always to hear "one" should restrict their reading to transcripts of the "Queens speech to Parliament"...
It's amazing to still find the problems and arguments that inspired Jonathan Swift being given house room in teachers brains in the 21 st century ....
We teach ( at home ..we are in Brittany ..France ) my eleven year old son perfect English and French ....He's taught himself German from TV and his own reading ....And I hope that he will end up speaking /reading /writing ..Spanglish and Franglais and Deutschlish etc and all use full combinations of those and any others he comes across ...
Pedantry in "Language" has made about as much contribution to human lives and happiness as religious fundementalistic orthodoxy ( all religions ...all of them! ) ....
Interesting point about forms used in other languages. I write in Italian and French, one of the sites that i was mentioning in the previous post was an Italian company with that problem of using the formal form...
It's still seen as too direct to use the informal 'tu' and the sloppy way of getting around that, a sort of 'you plural', is just as bad.
had a terrible time convincing the company that if they were going to go informal (and be direct) they should be consistent about it, they just weren't comfortable. In the end they did see that it was a schizophrenic approach to communication -- one that wouldn't be effective in the long run...
you may want to stand back & take a look at the 'voice' of your site & whether the tone is consistent & supports your overall strategy.
Strategy? What strategy? Har har...
This is exactly where I found myself. Standing back, that is. I was just wondering what you folks thought about it. I was looking to be consistent, but consistently what? Thanks for all your input.
Great Euro perspective, leosghost.
I find it interesting that I (a writer) have always refused to "write down" to the level that is "suggested" for (non-R-rated) fiction: that of a 10 year old (appx. 5th grade US). Hrrmmm. Sorry. Can't.
My usual written "level" in fiction is about PHD rank. So my editors make me "scale" it back to not more than college sophomore (for fantasy) and college senior (for sci-fi). When I was writing romance some years back I was getting scaled back to high-school freshman level. Since my books sell, I have to assume that my editors know whereof they speak....
As to actual POV I find it depends in large on WHAT you are writing, and your TARGET audience. If you're targeting 10 year olds, why write in a POV they will have trouble getting their heads around? Use first person, slant your descriptives their way, and use 5-word sentences. (5 word sentences, btw, are just fine in romance dialog - but unless the flitter is crashing into a bog of mud-creatures on Planet X, why would you want that artificial limit?)
If you're selling something you expect adults to want to buy, why write for a 10 year old? Write up the scale a bit, give the guy some credit for more brains than the general run of US football-&-beer ad-guys seem to do.... use second-person, and throw in some flash with your descriptors. Do NOT be tempted to worry about adverbs! (Um. Absolve me please of being nasty about beer ads - actually, the only truly WATCHABLE tv ads in this country are either alcohol oriented or car oriented. Football? I love it - fun game.... only stuff I really watch on tv is football, baseball, basketball, horse racing and rodeo....)
And if you're trying to sell something to a PHD, good luck and goddess bless. The FIRST thing you have to do is just get hisser attention!
