Friday Funnies 8.16.2024

[LifeinAsia]

She’s single, she’s shapely, she’s beautiful and she lives right across the street. I can see her place from my kitchen window.

I watched as she got home from work this evening. I was surprised when she walked across the street, up my driveway and knocked on the door.

I opened the door, she looked at me and said, “I just got home, and I have this strong urge to have a good time, dance, get drunk, and have sex tonight. Are you doing anything?”

I quickly replied, “Nope, I’m free!”

“Great,” she said. “Can you watch my dog?”

[Jonesy]

I'm getting old. A young lady invited me up to her apartment.
I needed to ask her if it had lots of steps.

[lucy24]

Oh, are we time traveling? In that case:

Two women are driving along in a Volkswagen when it suddenly stops. The driver runs to the front of the car, opens the hood, and exclaims “The engine’s gone!” Her passenger, meanwhile, has opened the trunk: “It’s all right, we have a spare.”

[Martin Potter]

Reading these, I was starting to feel young again.
Then I remembered. These are all just jokes.

[tangor]

... and tired old jokes at that!