today's adorable story

[lucy24]

... because we’re overdue for one.

An 89-year-old German man and an 85-year-old Danish woman (you can look up their names, but I’m doing this from memory) are carrying on their romance across a temporarily sealed border. Every day, she drives to the Danish side, and he bicycles to the German site, and they interact from a socially safe distance.

All together now: Awwwww.

[tangor]

Therapist: Your wife says you never buy her flowers.

Him: To be honest, I never knew she sold flowers.

[tangor]

Me: Alexa what’s the weather this weekend?

Alexa: It doesn’t matter – you’re not going anywhere.

[tangor]

To those who don't want Alexa listening to your conversations there's a new male version coming out ... it doesn't listen to anything.

[RhinoFish]

Alexa, play big fart.

You're welcome. :-)

[tangor]

It's been a bit of a strange day. First I found a hat full of money.

Then I was chased by an angry man with a guitar!

[tangor]

Picked up a hitchhiker. Seemed like a nice fellow. After a few miles he asked if I was worried about possibly picking up a serial killer.

I replied the odds of two serial killers in the same car were unlikely.

[lucy24]

First I found a hat full of money.

Years ago, someone wrote in to Miss Manners--this is really true--asking for advice about dealing with rubberneckers when painting en plain air. Miss Manners suggested the painter could keep people at a distance by putting out a hat.

[NickMNS]

Miss Manners suggested the painter could keep people at a distance by putting out a hat.

@Lucy24 are you suggesting that we all walk around with hat in hand? You know to ensure social distancing.

[lucy24]

Hm, now there’s an idea.

[tangor]

Hormel made their first batch of Spam in 1937.

Due to consumer hoarding they have announced
they will make a second batch.

[tangor]

Dolly Parton says:

Honey, before this quarantine is over some of ya'll gonna be begging Jolene to take your man.