Internet - Techie - Development Haiku

The news is depressing. Give haiku and give cheer.

[Lapizuli]

I'm told traditional Japanese haiku is not just about the right number of syllables and nature and stuff, it's more about double meanings and humor.

But at the very least, it's about 5-7-5. Who'll contribute?

Ahem. I will start.

Find myself at Home
No Contact or About Us.
How DMCA?

[Leosghost]

Make post on website
Need it to scan like haiku
Really must get out more

[Lapizuli]

Leosghost sorry
Your last line needs revision
Too many syllab

[Leosghost]

Say it don't read it
Haiku are made with your breath
Not heard with your mind

[Leosghost]

Or

[Leosghost]

Read it don't say it
Haiku are made with your mind
Not said with your breath

[Leosghost]

-^_^-

[Lapizuli]

Lucy24, I know you can do one. Where are you?

I'll try to keep this alive....

Password change again!
Why every time I log in?
Security, bah.

[lucy24]

Where are you?

In Book Twenty-Four
Of Chapman's Iliad, which
Is infested with

The round earth, heav’n’s great Queen, [**dit DAH missing] and Pallas; to whose bands

or

As num’rous; Phœbus still, before, for all their haste [**dit DAH missing],

or, worse,

Right on the scope still of a race, bear near, know ever [**TOO MANY BEATS] when to rein,

totaling at least a dozen lines-- I'm flagging them as I go along-- which flatly refuse to scan as iambic heptameters. No way, nohow.

But the end is in sight, and I'm feeling immensely pleased with myself because (a) I've figured out how to code it so that if a narrow viewport forces a line break, the break will come at the caesura, which will look pretty, and (b) in the course of those 24 books I've arrived at a RegEx that will correctly flag the aforesaid caesura in most lines, no counting-on-fingers required.

[Leosghost]

@Lapizuli...to think you said my last line had too many syllables ;)..

a haiku in regex would be impressive...?...

[tangor]

To code is divine
If the client pays on time
Or else I'm weeping.

[lucy24]

a haiku in regex would be impressive...?...

It's a matter of recognizing syllables, which is obviously much horribler in English than in Japanese (assuming kana). Removing the text-specific bits like

(?<!Achill|Æacid|Ajac|Atrid|Hercul|Merion|Neleid|Pelid|Priamid|Tydid|Ulyss)

this recognizes most of the present thread if you fix the apostrophes.

^(\p{Punct}*(?:th?’ )?(?:(?<=\W|\Wun)y)?(?:[b-df-hj-npr-tv-xz’]|qu)*(?:eye|[aeou]?y|u?e[ds]\B|au|ai?|eau?|ei(?!ty|ties)|e[eou]*|ia\B|(?<!char|\Wl)io(?!med)u?|(?<!cl)ie|i|oi(?!ng)|oe(?!ver)|o[aou]?|(?<!plag|tong)ue|ui(?!n)|ua?)(?:[b-df-hj-npr-tv-xz’]|qu)*(?:(?<=ais|am|car|ea[sc]|ev|for|[gh]at|her|hop|ho[ru]s|i[cfkmv]|\wov|peac|saf|sens|som|\Wus)e(?=\w’?\w)|(?<=plag|tong)ue’?[sd]?\b|(?<![bcdfghkpt][rl]|ss|\W\w|\W\wh)e(?=ly\W|\W)(?:’s)?|(?<![bcdfgkpst]l|[drst]|tch|nak)ed\b|(?<=\W[hs]id|besid)es?\b|(?<![sc]h|ss|[bcdfgkpst][rl]|[cgs])es’?\b)?\p{Punct}* ?){5}\n(\p{Punct}*(?:th?’ )?(?:(?<=\W|\Wun)y)?(?:[b-df-hj-npr-tv-xz’]|qu)*(?:eye|[aeou]?y|u?e[ds]\B|au|ai?|eau?|ei(?!ty|ties)|e[eou]*|ia\B|(?<!char|\Wl)io(?!med)u?|(?<!cl)ie|i|oi(?!ng)|oe(?!ver)|o[aou]?|(?<!plag|tong)ue|ui(?!n)|ua?)(?:[b-df-hj-npr-tv-xz’]|qu)*(?:(?<=ais|am|car|ea[sc]|ev|for|[gh]at|her|hop|ho[ru]s|i[cfkmv]|\wov|peac|saf|sens|som|\Wus)e(?=\w’?\w)|(?<=plag|tong)ue’?[sd]?\b|(?<![bcdfghkpt][rl]|ss|\W\w|\W\wh)e(?=ly\W|\W)(?:’s)?|(?<![bcdfgkpst]l|[drst]|tch|nak)ed\b|(?<=\W[hs]id|besid)es?\b|(?<![sc]h|ss|[bcdfgkpst][rl]|[cgs])es’?\b)?\p{Punct}* ?){7}\n(\p{Punct}*(?:th?’ )?(?:(?<=\W|\Wun)y)?(?:[b-df-hj-npr-tv-xz’]|qu)*(?:eye|[aeou]?y|u?e[ds]\B|au|ai?|eau?|ei(?!ty|ties)|e[eou]*|ia\B|(?<!char|\Wl)io(?!med)u?|(?<!cl)ie|i|oi(?!ng)|oe(?!ver)|o[aou]?|(?<!plag|tong)ue|ui(?!n)|ua?)(?:[b-df-hj-npr-tv-xz’]|qu)*(?:(?<=ais|am|car|ea[sc]|ev|for|[gh]at|her|hop|ho[ru]s|i[cfkmv]|\wov|peac|saf|sens|som|\Wus)e(?=\w’?\w)|(?<=plag|tong)ue’?[sd]?\b|(?<![bcdfghkpt][rl]|ss|\W\w|\W\wh)e(?=ly\W|\W)(?:’s)?|(?<![bcdfgkpst]l|[drst]|tch|nak)ed\b|(?<=\W[hs]id|besid)es?\b|(?<![sc]h|ss|[bcdfgkpst][rl]|[cgs])es’?\b)?\p{Punct}* ?){5}$

Haha, and you thought I was exaggerating.

[Lapizuli]

This is not going the way I thought it would...

[lucy24]

You're short six syllables :)

Come to think of it, "not going the way I thought it would" is probably the opener for at least half the questions ever asked on any forum anywhere. But in my mind it comes through as
not going the way I thought it would
(kaTHUMP, kaTHUMP et cetera)

[tangor]

@Lapizuli....

What do you expect? We're webmasters, not poets. I suspect some of us might be Japanese but the rest are not, and a few have no imagination, having only a mercenary soul, or an altruism that will turn the stomach, or so dhimsical (sic, new word!) that even the world's best comedians can't get a clue.

I scream for ice cream
Until hot dog falls in lap
Then scream for cold cream

lucy24 ..................................... < that is 5 syllables
grand show up of reg ex fun
thus are we now done?

[Lapizuli]

I do not know code.
But oh, do I know coders.
Language of their own.

[elguiri]

No sense to Adsense.
To fulfill my daily needs?
Affiliate leads.

[elguiri]

Furry animals.
Love them all, except for two:
Pandas and penguins.

[elguiri]

New algorithm?
Don't get angry. Plant some flowers!
(Right in Larry's a5s).

[elguiri]

I'm enjoying this.

[tangor]

Bing rise to new height
Google greatness waning low
Love from Duck Duck Go