Like the man said. Write what you know.
#1 Pick a subject that less than 1/1000 of 1% of the world's population is interested in-- and most of that .00001 knows more about it than you do.
#2 If you happen to land on a topic that you do know something about, put the relevant pages in two widely separated directories, neither of them with names giving any hint as to their content. If you later decide to consolidate them into a single directory, do it quick before you've had time to think about what the new index page should look like. You can always change it later. Three times a week until the monkeys-and-typewriters law kicks in.
#3 Rearrange your whole site at least twice a year, so the search engines have to scramble to catch up.
#4 Have a stupid domain name. Bonus points if you come up with something that will always be misspelled.
#5 Stick with designs that worked in 1998.
#6 When all else fails, edit your .htaccess. You didn't really need those seven hours' worth of visitors.
