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I have learned that there's no easy way to do this. There is some software out there that makes it happens, but once the contacts reach the PDA they are all mixed in together, then when you sync, Outlook thinks they are new contacts and puts them in with the main contacts list. Arrg. Hopefully Microsoft will include syncronization of multiple contact lists in later versions of PDA / Sync software.
The best way to manage contacts that you want sync'd on your PDA, but not visible when sharing your contacts is to mark them as "private". Not the optimial solution because my personal contacts are now mixed in with hundreds of business contacts, but it works.