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Pause Button for Flash Embedded in HTML?

Why is there no ability to pause/play/stop a video?

10:18 am on Feb 22, 2010 (gmt 0)

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I am a web developer that has no knowledge of flash. I embedded some youtube videos on my web site some time ago and they work great.

Now I have a video that is hosted by a vendor that I would like to put on my web site. I used the same code I did for YouTube (object and embed) and it plays great.

The trouble is, the video plays immediately when loading the web page. It will be on a product sales page and I don't want it to start unless the user clicks on a start button (or the video itself). Also, it would be nice if the user could also pause and restart the video.

1. Is it possible to put play/pause buttons on an embedded video that is hosted elsewhere?
2. If so, what are my options?
3. If not, is it possible to open the .swf file in flash and add this functionality? Note I didn't create the video, and don't have access to anything but the .swf.

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