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Software to filter profanity out of DVDs?

Lots for DVD players, can't find one for the computer

4:24 pm on Jul 9, 2010 (gmt 0)

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My wife and I don't have a TV or DVD player, nor space to put one in our tiny house. So we're only able to watch movies on my laptop, which is okay, except that we'd like to watch Gettysburg sometime soon but won't unless we can filter out the profanity somehow. And, while filtering DVD players are abundant, I can't seem to find any software that will do it.

Any ideas?