I agree... I'll not mention specifics, but there are a couple forums I won't visit here because of the moderators.
One of them actually made what seemed like a thinly veiled threat to ban me for asking about what type of work they did, even though the moderator guidelines clearly state: "Moderators are asked to refrain from any commercial or self promotion activities. Moderators should use their help contributions as a lost leader. Referrals will be generated off their profile." which seems to indicate I should be able to ask what type of work they do and even solicit services if I like, which an administrator seconded when I asked.
Really, many of the mods and admins are great, but some of them definitely have a 'holier than thou' attitude publicly and privately, and I think having a better system for reporting the types of issues I'm referring to might also be a good idea... (IOW: report sticky mail conversations in their entirety)
I honestly almost left the forums because of the responses I received from a mod via sticky mail. As a senior member who definitely contributes very actively it was not at all how I expected to be treated. The responses are what I would have expected out of WikiPedia and/or DMOZ, but not here.
Pretty sure this is way out of line with the general TOS, so feel free to snip away if you like, but I figured I would post since this thread is here and is addressing a very similar 'tone' or 'situation' as a couple I have dealt with.