Ref: Ac. No. 0777-45917-3112
We regret to note that, despite repeated reminders, your account appears to be overdue by £126.37. If this balance is not paid in full by close of business on Friday 30th of this month, we will commence immediate legal proceding to recover this debt.
We will also be seeking punitive damages to recover, not only our own expenses, but additionaly our standard breach of contract charge, as specified in paragraph iv, section 7b, of the credit agreement signed by yourself and in line with the Comnmercial Credit Act of 1984.
Could you also please put a single rose in a vase on your bedroom window cill, as an acknowledgment of reciept of this communication. We would also ask that you give your formal consent (by return) for one of our agents to collect photgraphic evidence of this act, for our records.
Your assistance in this matter would be most appreciated.
P.S. If you have paid your account within the last two days, please disregard this message.