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FBI "Rash of Sexting"
lexipixel




msg:4548155
 10:04 am on Feb 23, 2013 (gmt 0)

Too funny... Feb. 22, 2013 -- CNN reports:

FBI battling 'rash of sexting' among its employees
The FBI hopes these quarterly reports will stem what its assistant director called a "rash of sexting cases" involving employees who are using their government-issued devices to send lurid texts and nude photos.

"We're hoping (that) getting the message out in the quarterlies is going to teach people, as well as their supervisors ... you can't do this stuff," FBI assistant director Candice Will told CNN this week. "When you are given an FBI BlackBerry, it's for official use. It's not to text the woman in another office who you found attractive or to send a picture of yourself in a state of undress. That is not why we provide you an FBI BlackBerry."

[cnn.com...]

I didn't know you could get a rash...

 

piatkow




msg:4548162
 10:35 am on Feb 23, 2013 (gmt 0)

I thought that doing it all remotely by text was to avoid getting the rash!

lucy24




msg:4548165
 11:24 am on Feb 23, 2013 (gmt 0)

Oh, let them enjoy their new toys. After all, it was only around the week before last that FBI agents even got personal computers...

lawman




msg:4548166
 11:34 am on Feb 23, 2013 (gmt 0)

I'd rather be a secret service agent.

Leosghost




msg:4548170
 11:48 am on Feb 23, 2013 (gmt 0)

If I told you who I'd rather be..I'd have to kill you :)

I suppose a rash is better than an arrow to the knee

SevenCubed




msg:4548195
 4:01 pm on Feb 23, 2013 (gmt 0)

Ah, nothing gets the day rolling better than some good foo humour to lighten heavy hearts.

When they get their new Blackberry Z10's they are going to be able to send live st(r)eaming videos to each other. The department is going to issue them accompanied with packages of moist wipes -- for those; "adversely affected daily activities of several squads" moments.

I'd rather be a secret service agent.

That's the best especially if from birth. You get to be born of parents who were born in an obscure region that didn't maintain birth records. Plus, simultaneously another guy will be born a few provinces away with the exact same obscure name who will go on to become highly visible in the public eye thereby making you "obscured by clouds", just like the Pink Floyd instrumental (as member tbear pointed out) for the French movie "La Vallée". Obscured by illusion.

All the above is complimented by grandparents who change their family names midlife thereby negating a family history that dates back to 1605 in France, and maybe even beyond, though untraceable.

Circumstance will constantly arise throughout life's journey to ensure you somehow NEVER get an official certificate for any accomplishment; birth, high school, college, nada -- can't have those documents of proof kicking around after-the-fact.

Needless to say Charlie has every angle covered so that if said agent gets loose with tongue (or fingers via the internet) after a few beers he can be removed from service. Something harmless like get him locked up with nutters for a few weeks to discredit him. Yes yes, the head doc who has to endure him will miraculously be granted a few weeks of vacation afterward to recover and regain his confidence in asking future patients questions. (You didn't actually think heaven is without a sense of humour did you)?

Then if all that wasn't assurance enough of remaining incognito, on the last day of your mission you get cremated, scattered over the ocean, and forfeit a headstone. Just like extended family members without headstones or those with bodies that get donated to science (so that abundance of brain white matter can be studied). Never existed they say. Working for peanuts, no respect, blamed for everything, but the extended benefit plan is Superb. It's a thankless job but somebody has to do it. The CIA and FBI is child's play in comparison to being a secret service agent. Hey lawman, I'm going to need a real good advocate (French for lawyer) someday, flip me your calling card if you're up for the adventure will ya? Bonus if you have diplomatic immunity or interstellar experience.

PS - some of the above is an inside joke that only Leosghost would understand. Cheers buddy.

rocker




msg:4548197
 4:14 pm on Feb 23, 2013 (gmt 0)

If the agents are getting a rash from sexting, they must be doing it wrong. Someone needs to show them the proper distance to hold their camera/phone from the body. Any volunteers?

SevenCubed




msg:4548200
 4:20 pm on Feb 23, 2013 (gmt 0)

rocker it has taken aeons of evolution to get the monkey out of man, please don't encourage them to now get their monkeys out on cam.

SevenCubed




msg:4548479
 12:23 am on Feb 25, 2013 (gmt 0)

Concerning this story I was thinking about how it was Barack "Barry" Obama that got balls rolling with BlackBerry usage. I remember when he got elected in his first term he was insisting on using a BlackBerry as an approved device for government communications. I can't remember where I read the article, nor can I find it now, but needless to say it had to get security clearance. I'm guessing from the Secret Service. So it looks like it has propagated throughout various other U.S. government branches due to its strong security. There have been a few countries that have petitioned Research in Motion to open the OS up more so they could get into it deeper (presumably to track their citizens). It's widely used by government here in Canada.

Oh, and my reference Barack "Barry" Obama (along with his sister Maya) was in reference to a general interest article I read about him a few years ago. [thedailybeast.com...]

I don't know if it's in that article or not but in addition to his roots with an African father and his time spent abroad in Asia, he also has a brother-in-law that lives near me here in Ontario. Quite an international footprint.

I wonder if he originally took a liking to the device because it is close to BlackBarry :)

incrediBILL




msg:4548899
 6:18 am on Feb 26, 2013 (gmt 0)

Sounds like they're doing a lot of undercover work.

lucy24




msg:4549162
 7:34 pm on Feb 26, 2013 (gmt 0)

? I thought the whole point was that they aren't keeping things under cover.

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